I love this picture. It was snapped while taking family photos last fall, during one of our last attempts to get a picture with all the kids smiling at the same time. (And after trying to bribe with various treats, we still had exactly none of those from this particular day.)
Yes, I’m smiling, but it’s more the “this is total chaos!” and “what are we doing?!” kind of smile. Instead of crying (which would have been understandable), my hubby, Brian, and I just laughed about how crazy it all felt. And we laughed A LOT during that photo shoot!
We tried for a baby for over two years before getting pregnant with our first daughter, so the gift these girls are doesn’t often get lost on me.
Not to say that being a mom isn’t hard (because it is) or that things like postpartum anxiety and mom-guilt don’t still get the best of me at times (because they do). There are tantrums and tears daily, but man oh man, being a mom to these three is such a blessing!
Even so, it’s all too easy to get caught up in the overwhelm of motherhood. Simply meeting the daily demands of these adorable humans is a lot of work. (Hello dirty diapers, piles of laundry, and filling hungry tummies!) All of that is valuable and holds meaning in itself for sure, but there are SO MANY MORE things I want to do too.
I want to spend time talking with them instead of just talking at them.
I want to read with them.
I want to have fun and be silly with them.
I want to incorporate faith and gratitude into our everyday routine, including the seemingly mundane tasks.
In the months after our third baby was born last summer, I was having a tough time keeping up with even the most basic things, let alone the things I really wanted to do. I was in survival mode.
All sorts of grace for mamas with newborns, but after a few months of this, I knew I needed to make some changes.
This photo shoot was around the same time I realized I needed to better address my postpartum anxiety and take additional steps toward being emotionally, physically, and spiritually healthy. So, I asked for help, implemented a simple routine, spent more time in God’s Word, and lots more.
I’m in a way better spot than I was, and my whole family is better off for it too. I’m still learning, failing, and getting back up, but that’s how it goes, right?
This picture marks a special moment in time. It was hard and beautiful. Crazy and wonderful. It’s like motherhood in a snapshot. And despite the chilly wind and lack of cooperative smiles that also made up this moment, we were together. That was and is a wonderful gift.
